It is, of course, the brink of the new year. Which means that gym memberships are basically free! Because if you sign a 14 year contract at $1.99 a month, which you need because it's important to stay focused, then you will be skinny. Forget the fact that by February 16th the gym will be back to its regular go-ers and you are locked in paying $2 a month for the next 14 years because you "will go back" just not today. Or tomorrow. Or the next day because you have to feed your cat and then you have a prescheduled nap. And you also should really stare at the mess in your house for at least 4 hours before you decide to take another nap. You just can't make time that day. But maybe the day after that. Definitely the day after that.
Okay, but seriously. I've recently passed the 2 year mark on my journey to a healthier (hotter) me. I was down to 50 lbs lost... which was a GREAT place to be after 1.5 years of working towards this... and approxiamately 6 months of dilligent and focused weight loss. Then I got lazy. Or I fell in love. Which made me lazy. Either way. I got comfortable... in my old ways and habits again. I tasted a french fry after a 9 month french fry rehab and fell back in love with something new. So yet AGAIN. I am focused. I am not down 50 lbs anymore. And I'm not happy about it. I didn't "gain it all back" like people always tell you you will when you try to better your health and life.
So here I am. It seems like I'm criticizing you (and me) for starting this plea yet again on January 1st. First of all, I started it yesterday... which was the 27th of December (So ha!) Second of all, it just HAPPENS to be that that's when I hit my very upset place and refuse to get any fatter. I am terribly upset with the way my clothes fit and look and even worse what I see when I'm not wearing the clothes (that shrunk... because it's the clothes fault. And my laundry detergent. And my washing machine. And probably my closet's fault for being too humid and causing the clothes to shrink) And again, back to reality. It's my fault... for thinking it's fine to eat french fries... in large capacity whenever I want. Third of all, I am "dieting" as they call it. I've read so many books, magazines, etc. etc. on how to lose weight, how to diet, super foods, belly busting foods, blah blah blah if you get my point. I'm reading... ANOTHER book ;-) I like this book. It's Dolvett Quince's (from the Biggest Loser) The 3-1-2-1 Diet. Basically the concept is 3 days of "clean eating" followed by 1 "cheat day" then 2 days of "clean eating" and 1 "cheat day" and repeat. Before you get too excited... the cheat day has cheating and portion restrictions. I'm not going to go into detail about the plan... I just like it. The fitness guru boyfriend says no, but I haven't listened to him in a year and a half so why start now ;-) I got my book from the library... so #noexcuses.
To wrap that all up. STOP dieting. You heard me. Now you're confused. Adopt a healthy lifestyle. Eating consciously. Exercising. Sleeping enough. Drinking heavily, water that is. Reading. Those are all the things that are part of my new diet. I've got a tip for you. 1200 calories (or less) is never okay. Caloric intake is the biggest discussion among people who want to lose weight. Okay... Pickles are like 5 calories for 4 pickles... So all day you can eat 960 pickles and meet 1200 calories... Don't mind the fact that a) you will be starving from lack of substance and b) you will die the next day from sodium intake. Similar to an all celery "diet". Stop the madness. Stop what I call "fad dieting" and starting changing your diet! See how the same word reflects just as evenly. I did it... it works. I know it does. But NEVER stop. One french fry is NOT okay. It's just not. For many of us, eating is a disease. Like anorexia, bulimia, alcoholism, drug abuse... all diseases. A lack of impulse control. As my boyfriend repeatedly states my problem is that I "can't control my emotions and when something goes a little wrong I use it as an excuse to eat like crap and whine about it." Yeah, he's full of fun advice. BUT... never will I admit to him that he of course is right and he knows this because he was my personal trainer and knows my terrible emotional conflicts inside and out. Partly because he is half of them.
Which leads me to my next soap box. You can look however you want... trust me, I don't care. You should not buckle to the pressure of society, you should not be a size 00, you SHOULD be healthy. It's better for your body, it's better for your mind, it's better for your life span. Overeating is a disease. It's controlled by your emotions. I LOVE the Biggest Loser. And I LOVE watching the trainers break down the emotional walls of all these people because I've totally been there. You realize that you have been self deprecating and have been in control the whole time and you chose to be out of control. The way you eat is directly related to your emotions, your stress level, etc. You HAVE to make smart choices all the time. Being healthy is kind of like having another job. Like almost everything in your life, it will require hardwork. Like your relationships, your marriage, raising your kids, your actual job, etc. A healthy lifestyle requires hard work and commitment. I adopted a slogan a while back "the gym is my boyfriend" which kind of correlates. My healthy lifestyle is my boyfriend... because if I cheat on it or if I don't commit to it, if I stray away from it... in a REAL boyfriend girlfriend relationship... my ass would be to the curb, unless we had some weird open relationship. But assuming I don't.
Take yourself seriously this year. Make small goals, see small victories, and see those small victories eventually turn into big victories.
Don't EVER let anyone else make you feel defeated or worthless or like you can't do it... like you're on another one of "those diets"... it is HARD. And you will slip up. You will. Do yourself a favor and DO NOT beat yourself up over ONE french fry (or a whole Large fry...) or a piece (bag) of chocolate or whatever your weakness is. Just try harder next time to not overindulge. And maybe work out an extra 10 minutes. But do NOT give up. Start over at the NEXT meal, immediately.
Would you rather look back at the time and think "I could have lost 25 lbs by now and gained so much muscle" or "I'm really glad I watched that TV show instead of going to the gym."
So. That's my advice. I'll keep you posted on how this is going for me. Keep me posted on what you do or decide. I believe in you. And if you stop believing in you... come to me. I'll pick you back up. Don't let someone who doesn't know what you're capable of ever doubt you.
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